Transvestia

self in the form of complete happiness. Not a gig- gling, gushing kind of pleasure, but a deep down awareness of having come home to being at last and truly me, Me, ME!

This leads to consideration of the second part of the title; "What is the Goal?" I might have called it "Whither are we drifting?" More than once the question has been asked of me, "Where does TV lead, what is the end result"? Several years ago I got into some pretty long and involved dis- cussions with one of my older readers and friends (and when she reads this she'll know I mean her) who took the position that the only logical end of TV development was either homosexuality or transexuality. Consulting myself as an example as I always do, I just knew that wasn't so and had great arguments with her about it. However, I could only assert that it wasn't so and try to support this position in every way I could. I was not able, though, to put up any very clear cut alternative goal or end point. I felt my friends points were wrong but I couldn't produce a very satisfying alternative other than to contend that one could just go on being a TV indefinitely without falling off of the track to either the right or the left.

Now, however, I do have the alternative in what I have described to you above. Very unfortunately and unhappily, very few TVs will achieve this goal. This is not a way of saying that I am special and better etc. etc. because I've made it and you wont. No, it is not that I as a person have any better qualifications than the next TV, but we are so sur- rounded by limitations, complications, inhibitions, antagonisms, fears, responsibilities, penalties, and on and on, you all know what I mean, that the chances for anyone pulling through that morass are not very great. I've been through the pain of exposure twice and suffered considerably but also freeing myself of

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